not really thanksgiving (a quick reflection from past to present)

by lynface

I remember growing up Thanksgiving signaled an ice hockey tournament in either Sacramento, Los Angeles, or at the nearby rink. my family and I spent it in a cold arena with other families screaming at every play and warming ourselves up with hot chocolate from the vending machine near the stands. we were surrounded by other families too, who bought snacks and food from the gas station nearby. who never had turkey but a good road trip to a championship. this is what my Thanksgiving looked like until I was about 15 or 16 years old — a Filipino family surrounded by their love for each other and the game of ice hockey. plus no clue that Thanksgiving was any form of a holiday.

now fast forward to the present. my kuya and I are now in our thirties and today’s holiday among our extended families are slim. it’s often spent with just my parents, and my cousin who’s basically our sibling. it’s relaxed, it’s small, and it’s spent with a modest collection of our favorite dishes. it’s about the simplicity of presence and the time with one another. it is humble, and never flashy. in fact, as I type this, my dad is cooking sopas (my favorite of his and a recipe passed down from my Nanay), my mom is sitting on the couch listening to Christmas music my dad’s collected and played every year since I can remember. as she listens with her eyes closed, and my dad cooks in the kitchen, I’m waiting for my kuya to come over so we can have dinner with our small family. it’s a small gesture, but it means the world to me. 

I am grateful, super grateful to be home this year.